Crucified Hearts

I found this list on a website, The London Economic, while check up on an idea as I was writing today (see the previous post). For the reader’s convenience, for you, I am posting this list separately. Below the list are some other thoughts on fear (and shame).

TOP 40 FEARS AMONG CHILDREN: source The London Economic

1. Spiders
2. The Dark
3. Monsters under the bed/in the cupboard
4. Thunder and lightning
5. Wasps
6. Being alone
7. Loud noises
8. People wearing masks
9. Dogs
10. Strangers
11. Dentists
12. Clowns
13. Ghosts
14. Needles
15. Snakes
16. Moths
17. Death
18. Costume Characters (eg Football mascots, characters at theme parks)
19. Heights
20. Zombies
21. Doctors
22. Toilets & Bathrooms
23. Blood
24. Sharks
25. Loneliness
26. Bears
27. Cats
28. Loss
29. Ants
30. Santa Claus
31. Flying
32. Worms
33. Dolls
34. Water
35. Birds
36. Cars and other vehicles
37. Butterflies
38. Fish
39. Forests
40. Tooth Fairy

I had some of these fears as a child. I was afraid of not being loved, the dark, my parents divorce, alcoholic family, storms, shadows at night, strange sounds while lying in bed, loneliness, other peoples dogs, getting hurt, fighting, and so on. The dentist was not my friend. But like some, I was not afraid of not having enough to eat, of homelessness, or unremitting disease. I did, most all the time as a child, feel dis-ease.

It is common for some fears to follow us into adulthood, renaming them as ‘phobias’ as they persist, ever-present, dominating us and our relations. We are not always conscious of them, but they can control us from deep within, unseen, which is a fear’s common thing, to retreat to the shadows. This is perhaps most common (and hurtful to us and others) when we hide the reality of our true selves within our pleasures, those places that we escape to in fun and frivolity, when life is too painful and hard.

Paradise, that thing we lost in the beginning, is a strange place to hide.

“And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, “Where are you?” 10 And he said, “I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.” 11 He said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?” 12 The man said, “The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate.” Gen. 3.8-13

We hide the shame of our moral nakedness, if not physical, with blame and denial, running from the truth of who we have become in our sin and rebellion, our fear of the love that would heal us. How cruel our fears can make us, how irresponsible, defensive, and angry. Unhealed fear will kill us. Sometimes is leads us to kill others, even those who only wandered into the path of our darkness.

Nor does it work, the hiding in pleasure. Very temporary and self-deceiving, like thinking a fig leaf will hide the shame of my nakedness. I need a big cut of cloth. God gave new cloths to Adam and Eve. It required an animals death. More to be ashamed of, you’re very existence being the cause of death. So, the unremitting shame of being.

The God who made me knows how to heal my wounds, setting me right to him, to myself, and to others. He makes it all “right”.

God gives me that in Christ, a clean robe of His righteousness.

Zechariah 3.1-5

“Then he showed me Joshua the high priest standing before the angel of the Lord, and Satan standing at his right hand to accuse him. 2 And the Lord said to Satan, “The Lord rebuke you, O Satan! The Lord who has chosen Jerusalem rebuke you! Is not this a brand plucked from the fire?” 3 Now Joshua was standing before the angel, clothed with filthy garments. 4 And the angel said to those who were standing before him, “Remove the filthy garments from him.” And to him he said, “Behold, I have taken your iniquity away from you, and I will clothe you with pure vestments.” 5 And I said, “Let them put a clean turban on his head.” So they put a clean turban on his head and clothed him with garments. And the angel of the Lord was standing by.”

This comes to mind too, this encouraging word of God about my fears and shame, my fear of not being loved, of being treated as a mere object of other’s desires or fears. I’ll close with this Word about that.

Romans 8.31-39

“What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? 33 Who shall bring any charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? 36 As it is written,“For your sake we are being killed all the day long;we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.” 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”